“Now, I’m tired and cranky. Not to mention hungry. Can I go home now? Well, not home, home but Bella’s home. Do I have to hear you two fuck? ‘Cause if I do, I’m going to kill myself.”
“Emmett, shut up,” I hissed. Edward was hiding behind me, his face flaming against my hair.
“I’m kidding, Bellaboo,” he replied, ruffling my hair. I glowered at him. “Seriously, though. Can we go? I’d like to start looking for new digs. The ultimate bachelor pad, you know?”
“Emmett, you are too much,” Edward snickered. “I mean, you are suing your ex-wife for defamation of character and slander after having lies spread about you about being an abusive husband. You were so pissed in the car. Now? You’re making jokes and shit.”
“I can choose to be bitter and vindictive like she-who-shall-not-be-named, or I can choose to be a goofball. I’m choosing the latter since that’s who I am,” Emmett said seriously. “Though, I don’t want to hear your collective moaning. It’s like a porn studio with you two.”
“Emmett, you don’t have to worry about the porn studio,” Edward explained. “I’m probably going to sleep at my own place after tonight.”
“What?” I whimpered.
“I haven’t been there in nearly two months, Bella. I’m paying rent for a place I’m not staying at. I have to make sure that everything’s kosher. Get my mail, pay my bills, do my laundry, throw away the science experiment in my fridge,” he said quietly, caressing my cheeks. I nodded. Edward and I weren’t living together. I didn’t expect him to stay with me.
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