“Isabella Marie Swan! I love you like a sister but you’re a fucking idiot,” Angela snapped. “Get up.” I heaved my tired body off the ground and Angela grabbed my arm, leading me into the living room. “Sit down and listen to what I have to say. That man spent the afternoon waiting for you here in this apartment. He was so worried, Bella. All he wanted to do was talk to you but you fucking shut him out. What the hell?! You can see it, as plain as day, that man loves you more than his own life.”
“He doesn’t love me. Why would he?” I growled in return. “He’s got that gorgeous blonde to cuddle with at night.”
“If you actually gave Edward a chance to talk, you would have known that the blonde was his sister,” Angela said, crossing her arms over her chest. “She was having a panic attack when you walked in and Edward was trying to calm her down.” I blinked and looked at my fingers. “Bella, I know that you are not the most confident woman, but you have to get over this. If you don’t, you’re going to spend your entire life alone.”
“I wished for death today, Ang,” I whispered. “It’s not the first time.”
“You’re not going to hurt yourself are you? Do I need call a shrink and get you admitted to the hospital on a psych hold?” Angela asked, arching a brow. I shook my head and continued to stare at my hands. “Bella, what can we do to make you believe in yourself?”
“There’s nothing you can do,” I whimpered. “It’s something that I have to do on my own.”
“Bella, I know that you were teased and ridiculed by your dad and by the slut sisters, but you are so much more than them,” Angela whispered. “You’re an amazing nurse with a giving heart and loving soul. Why do the words of those people mean so much to you when the words that I say or that Edward says mean nothing?”
“Because for a majority of my life, all I heard was that I was worthless, stupid, fat and nothing,” I said, glaring at my friend. “When that’s all you hear, it’s what you believe. Fifteen years of ridicule and teasing will not change overnight with the words of a few friends and…and…Edward.”
“Your boyfriend,” Angela said. I looked away and frowned. Angela sighed and put something into my lap.
“Edward asked me to have you read in your journal.” I looked down and saw one of the journals that he gave me for Christmas on my lap with his keys laying on top. “I’m going to shower and call Ben. Read the fucking journal, Bella. It’ll only reiterate what I told you, I’m certain.” Angela got up and left me in the living room.