“Edward, you need to calm down. Threatening to kill Riley will not bring back Bella’s ability to bear children,” Jasper said, holding up his hands. I growled at him, wanting to throw him out the window. “Okay, poor choice of words.”
“I want to rip him to shreds,” I snarled. “No man has that right. It’s her body.”
“And if you rip him to shreds, you’ll be recycled and Bella will fade away, becoming one with the darkness,” Jasper snapped. “Do you want that? You love her, but you’re willing to give up everything to seek revenge. As much as I can’t stand you, we need you, Edward. She needs you.”
I sobbed, sitting down heavily on the chair in my living room. I thrust my hands into my hair, my heart stammering against my rib cage and Bella’s pain radiating through every bone of my body. “You don’t feel her like I do. She deserves happiness, love, tenderness, joy … She’s gotten nothing but anguish, pain, agony, and misery. It kills me to not be able to fix it. I must fix it. I have to fix it! It’s my job as her mate.”
Jasper sat down across from me, tentatively reaching out and touching my knee. “I feel the same way about Alice. I understand, Edward.”
I jerked away, moving my body and curling up in the chair. I wanted to hold Bella, do everything in my power to heal her, to make her pain dissipate. “I hate feeling so helpless,” I whispered. “What can I do? What can I say to help her heal? To show her that she’s worthy of love and being loved? This is beyond our powers. Her pain is mental and emotional.”
“That’s the worst kind,” Jasper sighed. “Emotional pain leaves no scars, but is the most challenging to heal. There’s no quick fix with our powers. Time, tenderness, patience and love are the only ways to help with emotional pain.”
“I’m afraid that no amount of time, tenderness, patience or love will help Bella. Did you hear her story?” I whispered, my voice cracking with emotion.
“Only the verbal part of your conversations,” Jasper muttered. “I don’t have the mental connection that you and Alice share with Bella.”
“You can’t read minds?” I asked.
“Only with my humans that I’m responsible for,” Jasper explained. “Though, I can begin to hear echoes of Bella’s voice. My guess is that because we’re protecting her, my “mental” tuning is being adjusted to hear her. But, that’s only happened when you were attacked by Lucifer in the school’s parking lot. Her mental voice is nearly silent, only brought to my attention when under extreme duress.” He stood up and blew out a harsh breath. “We may never be friends, Edward, but I’m sympathetic to what you’re dealing with. I also know that you’re still healing from your ordeal. You need to get some rest.”
“I can’t rest until I know she’s okay,” I choked out. “I need to hold her.”
“She needs time,” Jasper said. “You know that.”
“Yeah,” I sighed. “So do I. Can you just go? Thank you for staying with me even though you hate my guts.”
“I don’t hate you. I don’t like you. There’s a difference,” Jasper snorted. “You broke my Alice’s heart.”
“I didn’t break her heart. I love Alice like a sister. Nothing more,” I bit out.
“Jasper, stop being a jerk. I may have been interested in Edward romantically at first, but I never pushed myself on him,” Alice snapped. “He’s a good man. I’ve gotten over it. You need to do the same.” Jasper growled, turning on his heel and stomping out onto the back patio. He rolled out his wings and took off. “I’m sorry about him, Edward. He’s still sore about … you know. World War II?”
“Alice, I’d really like some time alone,” I whispered. “I know I need rest. I know I need to eat, but I need her