Sunday, September 25, 2011

The Geek's Guide to Parenthood Teaser

I tucked into my plate of lasagna. Dear God in heaven…food. Real food. Not hospital slop. I inhaled my plate of the goodness that is lasagna and begged for another piece. Bella had come back as I was wolfing down my third serving.

“Jesus, Cullen,” she snickered. “Miss your home cooked food?”

“Fuck yes,” I said as I damn near licked the fucking plate.

“Edward Anthony, watch your mouth,” Esme chastised. “You used to be so reserved and polite. Now you’re swearing like a truck driver.”

“Blame Rose,” Bella said. “She’s said things that’ll make a sailor blush. She’s got a potty mouth, that one. Speaking of Rose, where is she?”

“She and Demetri went to change Kyra. About a half  hour ago,” I said, arching my brow.

“Oh God,” Bella grumbled as she shot up from her seat. I was on her heels as we both jogged to the nursery. When we got there, about fifty diapers were on the floor by Demetri’s feet. Rose was holding a naked Kyra trying to stop her from crying. The room was filled with the stench of baby crap. Bella went over and swiped Kyra from Rose’s arms. Rose apologized profusely and said that she’d never changed a diaper before. Demetri was standing at the changing table in shock. Covered in piss.

That’s my girl.

I shoved him away and told him to get us an economy sized pack of diapers. He woodenly nodded and tugged Rose’s shirt.

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